Genesis 37-42

Grow where you are planted

It's not fair. I should not have to be going through this again. At 17 I had my world ripped apart as I mourned the untimely death of my high school sweetheart, who had just turned 20. Now, 23 years later, I mourn the untimely death of my own firstborn child, also age 20. Both were killed suddenly in accidents that no one could have foreseen; twice my world just went from (relatively) happy and carefree to utter devastation in a matter of seconds, and it's just not fair.

But that's life, right? Life's not fair.

Ugh, how I hate that sentiment. (By the way, I'm sure you don't need reminding that it's not one you should ever say to someone who is grieving.) Sure, I say it to my sons when they complain that the older one gets to stay up later or the younger one doesn't have to do the same chores. It's just easier than trying to explain to a child that older bodies can handle things that younger bodies can't. They don't get it; they stubbornly refuse to see themselves and each other as anything other than completely capable of bearing any burden that anyone else can. If only they knew what true burdens we are preparing them for – burdens we know they will one day have to face... and those we pray they never will.

Joseph's brothers thought that life wasn't fair. Their father Jacob had a favorite, and he was not discrete about it. Even Joseph knew it, and was inclined to rub it in his brothers' faces once in a while. Not a good move on his part, but we all know that's what siblings do. What siblings don't normally do is take revenge the way Jacob's sons did. They dug a well and trapped their brother Joseph in it. After debating about killing him, at least one brother had the sense to talk them into just selling him into slavery. In an instant, Joseph found himself a slave in the strange land of Egypt, away from his family and his happy, carefree life.

Rather than wallow in his misery, Joseph made the best of his situation. Despite the bit of arrogance he occasionally displayed with his brothers, he was a man of God and of strong moral character. He was soon given a place of honor in his master Potiphar's house and again his life, although still bound to servitude, was relatively happy and carefree. And then Potiphar's wife tried to seduce him. Of course he rebuffed her, but she was angry at his rejection, so she lied and had him arrested and all his comforts stripped away. Although Joseph's strong moral character had shone through and he did everything right, he still ended up the victim of life's propensity to be utterly unfair. Now in a cold, dank jail cell with no hope of a fair trial, no ally, and no plan in sight, Joseph could certainly not be blamed if he were to give into despair.

Later, Pharaoh had his chief cupbearer and baker thrown into prison with Joseph, and here were two guys feeling hopeless. They were even plagued with unsettling dreams and began to talk to Joseph about them. Instead of joining the two disgraced royal servants in commiserating, Joseph did the only thing he knew and turned to God for guidance. God granted Joseph interpretations for the dreams, which were instantly proven to be accurate. The baker, whose dream was a bad omen, was lead to his execution the very next day. The cupbearer's dream, however, was indicative of his restoration of good grace to Pharaoh's service, which also happened the next day. As he was being released, the cupbearer promised to tell Pharaoh of Joseph and put in a good word, but caught up as he was in his own delight of deliverance, he forgot.

So there sat Joseph, who had once again been the good guy and done everything right but instead of a reward, he was destined to remain in jail forgotten for another two years. It just wasn't fair. By chance, God gave Pharaoh a dream that nobody could interpret, and the cupbearer suddenly recalled that he had met someone in prison who had helped him out. I don't know for sure, but I would have to imagine that it took some courage for someone as lowly as a cupbearer to speak up to the very agitated Pharaoh about Joseph in the first place. I would guess that Pharaoh, having already once thrown the cupbearer in prison for some offense would not hesitate to do the same or worse if he was wasting his master's time bringing some disgraced slave out of jail to do what all of Pharaoh's wisest magicians and sages could not. Now, Joseph could have come out of his cell bitter and angry and I would not have wanted to be that cupbearer when Pharaoh calls out Joseph on his ability to interpret dreams and Joseph's response is, “I cannot do it” (Gen 41:16a). Maybe the cupbearer thought that Joseph was having his revenge for having forgotten him in jail for two whole years.

Instead, of course, Joseph does what he has always done. He gives the glory to God. He acknowledges that all talents, all life, and all opportunities are gifts from our Creator, and then he goes on to interpret Pharaoh's dream. The result is such high favor in the eyes of the Pharaoh that Joseph is placed second in command of the entire nation of Egypt. He saves Egypt and the surrounding nations from famine, and more importantly he eventually brings restoration to his own family so that God's plan for the sons of Israel to grow and multiply can unfold. All because he accepted again and again that life isn't fair... but God is. Can you imagine - not blaming God for your troubles, but finding a way to use your faith as a trellis to grow despite them?

I know our personal wounds are still raw. I know we are in a place of struggling between wanting to be strong enough to bear the grief, and being so young in it that some days we just can't. And I know that, like our children, we stubbornly refuse to see ourselves and each other as anything other than completely capable of bearing any burden. Of course in these times we mourn, we grieve, we cry out. But will we stay here in bitterness, or will we trust God? As for me, I have to trust God because I am at least old enough to know that life isn't fair, but He is. I have seen how quickly it can go from happy and carefree to devastation and despair with no warning, but I have also seen time and again that it doesn't stay there.

So what do we do in the mean time? Do we fight with our whole being to get out of these valleys of life, clawing at the walls until our fingernails bleed? Or do we ask God while we are here to help us learn, grow, and maybe help others, as Joseph did, to bear or even avoid their own devastation? We don't always get to choose where we are planted, but we can choose whether to wither and die there or to grow and bear fruit. As for me and my house...(Joshua 24:15).